Speaking Falsely

The key to being a successful liar is to sprinkle just enough truth to where even the most sour lie goes down like sugar.  That said, I don’t always follow my own advice.  I often have several arcs in play at any given moment with people that are close to each other.  If they were so keen as to compare notes, I’d be in a world of hurt.  Often, these arcs are spun simply for the sake of lying, not out of convenience or any other tangible benefit to me.  I’ve known of many others that are or claim to be psychopathic and the narrative seems to hold.  Our tongues get us into trouble because we simply are prone to speak falsely.

I don’t particularly know how to describe it.  We could have a factual statement that has no bearing on anyone’s livelihood, such as “I’m five minutes late for dinner because I window shopped too long,” and it gets instantaneously spun into “I’m five minutes late for dinner because there was a horrific wreck along the route home.”  I don’t wish to imply that such automatic lies are tied to exaggeration, however.  Sometimes the lie is as bland as the truth.  I don’t even consciously realize that I’m spinning lies most of the time.  Sure, there are those that are terribly important such as to save an interpersonal relationship from my apathy or negligence, but often I’m just “yip yip” for the sake of it.

Is truth really that boring?  Am I subconsciously working on my skills to ensure that they are always up to snuff?  I don’t claim to understand, but I do know that I’m not alone on this front.  There is no substantial pleasure gained from such lies.  There are no tangible benefits to such lies.  I lie simply because I can, without thought or care as to why.  If any of my readers have insight, I’d greatly appreciate it.

Reciprocity
Destroy the Mimic

Comments

  1. says

    I was searching transgender and lying and BPD and found your Speaking Falsely blog and can’t believe my eyes. I thought for a minute it was my child writing under an alias but I don’t think he’d use a female name, and while he is very intelligent, I don’t think his writing skills compare to yours. Close though. At any rate, please continue to write because I think as a parent I need to read your stories to help me understand my own child because I ha e been so confused, scared, and depressed about his personality and behavior for so long, it’s just for me to realize it is what it is, and try to learn a way to understand it so that I can more effectively communicate with him. Thank you.

    • FNP says

      So the first place you thought to get advice was from a blog for psychopaths by a psychopath?

      Congratulations on your complete and utter lack of critical reasoning skills.

      • says

        Who said anything about getting advice? My kid doesn’t talk much and when he does it reminds me Jessica so if I find it interesting to hear her words in the hopes of trying to get some of the things that are happening in my child’s world and mine, then so be it. I sure as shit ain’t getting it from the therapist. It’s good reading. Leave your comments to yourself instead of insulting someone.

        • FNP says

          You did actually say that you find this blog useful for learning how to communicate with and understand your kid. That implies a level of advice you’re gaining from the posts.

          If you think that I’m insulting you by saying you’re getting advice from a psychopath… you’re going to get insulted a lot.

          • Anonymous says

            Not necessarily. She may just wanna know what’s going on inside her kid’s head and thinks the author is a good model for that.

          • GNW says

            It’s still not advice. It’s understanding. I can’t change this kid because he’s a grown adult who doesn’t communicate with me if this is how I can try to gain some insight then this is how I can try to gain some some insight. And I’m used to being insulted this isn’t my first rodeo, doesn’t mean I can’t call a person out for unnecessary insulting. I’ve apparently have already had enough of my time wasted on this ridiculous chatter though so I will continue to read and not comment unless I’m really bored or have a burning question. Otherwise I must go back to my computer and work now until 5pm. Good day.

  2. says

    Yeah. Lol. Welcome to the thriving community of… ahem.. the lack of community and simple, common understanding. Leave that for the “normals”. Many people here can’t look past themsleves and they don’t lack empathy. They lack personal insight and assimilation through experience. In short, they are devoid of any real absorbtion, growth or learning. (I’ll never believe this, but this is what they keep saying and want. xD) You won’t learn much here except seeing a sad person describe what sadness is in a non feeling way. Can’t believe a psychiatrist for a perspective of a “psychopath” because why would they know?

    • FNP says

      That list showed that people with ADHD lie to avoid disappointing people. That’s really not at all similar to why psychopaths lie.

      Us psychopaths lie because it’s easy, because it’s fun, because we don’t want to get caught, because we’ve been caught and don’t want punishment, and just for the hell of it.

      Moreover, ADHD people tend to not be risk-takers, or antisocial, or really any of the traits that psychopaths have.

  3. NTL says

    To be honest, I don’t think psychopaths are alone on that front. Some people become consummate liars because it was, at one point in their lives, needed. Even from an NT’s point of view, saying “I’m five minutes late for dinner because I window shopped too long,” is more of a pain in the ass than saying “I’m five minutes late for dinner because there was a horrific wreck along the route home.” That’s simply because with the former, people may become irritated with you as it was “your fault”, while in the latter blaming you for being late would be blaming you for the car accident, and that would just be stupid.

    So yeah, most people lie like this out of practicality, it saves time and being scolded is, whether you’re NT, a psychopath or whatever, usually a pain in the ass. So yeah, we do what we do for the same reason we faked our parents’ signatures when we had to justify why we weren’t in class yesterday, or what have you.

    The NT may even tell lies not because they benefit him in any direct or indirect way, but because they benefit the person who’s being lied to, so in that way, the NT is even more likely to lie. And then, once you’ve done this a few times, it becomes a habit and you do it automatically without even paying attention.
    Though deliberately lying for no purpose or reason may be something unique to psychopaths and other atypical people.

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