Recapitulate

No new content today.  If you missed them, here are some choice posts from the last month and a half with brief commentary explaining what the posts are about.  I’m going to try and do one of these ‘recaps’ on the last day of every month given the growing readership and the non-obvious, but intentional, naming scheme I use for posts.  Remember, that you can follow me on Twitter: @Psychogendered (you can follow with one click from the widget on the right side of the blog pages) and can contact me with any questions you may have.

Conscience – A look at how questions of morality do not enter the psychopath’s thought process when doing “good” or “bad”.

Passing (2 posts) – What it means to remain in the shadows and to be perceived as a member of a socially accepted group.  The first post deals with transgenderism, the second with psychopathy.

Momentary – My personal experience from not being able to value anything but the present.  My past and future mean nothing.

Regret – Two posts, LGT first post.  Specifically looks at any regrets I have over being transgender and how those regrets are shaped by my psychopathy.

Cull – The psychopath often leaves relationships and friendships on a whim.  But is this really a bad thing or do we just know our wants and desires better than most?

Diagnosis (3 posts) – A look at the emotions and thoughts I had when being diagnosed as a psychopath and what I intend to make of the present and the future as a result of that diagnosis.

Vortex – A look into self-centeredness

Them

A news story making the rounds details the savage mutilation of a young Chinese boy who had his eyes gouged out with unspecified tools.  The story is graphic.  The story did evoke some emotion in me, but it was definitely not of empathy.  The immediate response was that this happened to someone else and that it would be unfortunate if it were to happen to me.  It was them, not me.

Try as I might, and I do try, I simply cannot empathize with the victim.  There is some link that is just missing.  I try to connect with the victim because I am still exploring myself.  I want to know what I am capable of and what I am not.  It has been a while since my diagnosis of psychopathy, but I am a questioning person that accepts little as unquestionable truth.  As a result, I constantly try to test my limits within socially acceptable boundaries to see where the ‘true’ me lies.  This story was another reminder that I am simple not able to give empathy.   However, as I wrote in the previous paragraph, this did elicit some emotion.

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Impartial

One of the greatest gifts of my psychopathy is that I place no value judgement on the actions of myself or others.  Where many would have a visceral and emotional reaction to seeing a cat rescued from a tree or of seeing a person con another out of life savings, I do not.  Whereas some would be quick to place morality, or value judgement, on such actions, I do not.  I can see clearly, merely taking in the information at hand and evaluating how it affects me.  I am not blown off-course by looking at the morality of it.

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Exploit

I’ve struggled with chemical mood disorders for most of my life.  It was relatively recently that my medical team found out how to mitigate the symptoms to my satisfaction.  I am extremely glad that those days appear to be behind me, and distance has allowed me to see how even my mental illness could be used as a psychopathic tool.

People use illness or disability, either real or fictitious, for personal gain all the time.  Those with real illness or disability use it to gain the closer parking spot or to obtain a meal that they are simply too weak to prepare themselves.  The more sinister feign such maladies in order to leech off of others, to parade Fluffy around wherever they go, and to collect money they are not entitled to.  Society, generally, has decided on every level that those that have difficulty due to physical or mental impairment should have help with living their lives as best that they can.  It is the extension of the empathy found in most human beings: we help those that cannot help themselves.

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Connotation

I’m often asked why I use the term psychopath instead of sociopath.  Within the primary literature there is as much confusion between the terms between each other and between the syndrome those words model and the official DSM condition of Antisocial Personality Disorder.  According to the DSM, neither psychopathy or sociopathy are distinct disorders from ASPD.  This is a shame as psychopathy and sociopathy are more “complex” than ASPD.  These words represent a complex and seemingly infinite number of representations of a more multi-faceted syndrome.  ASPD tends to focus on the criminal side of human nature whereas psychopathy/sociopathy focuses on a mindset that does not require criminality to the same degree for diagnosis.  While it is true that many psychopaths and sociopaths have committed criminal acts, it is not true that many ASPD persons are psychopaths or sociopaths.  There is clearly a difference.  However, this does not explain my choice of the word psychopath for this blog and my discussions.

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